The Warpath

Testing a Chipotle Conspiracy Theory

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BY ELLIE KAPCAR

So my sister has a conspiracy theory. When she orders Chipotle on the app, she typically names her burrito “Derek” because she believes they’ll pack it with more food than under her name, “Abbie.” Is there any truth to this?

After a tiresome investigation, I’m retiring from my short-lived career of testing conspiracy theories. Sometimes you just can’t find all the answers, and that’s okay.

The Witnesses
A little sister with a big appetite, Abbie noticed a trend when ordering her burrito.

She says, “I always get the same burrito when I go to Chipotle. But I’ve found that when I go in and order a burrito and they see that I’m a young girl, the portion is smaller. When I order online and I change my name to ‘Derek” my burrito is larger.”

The Evidence
With the help of some avid burrito-lovers, we ordered identical burritos under different names throughout the week. Specifically we tested Butch (the manly man), Lucy (the little girl), and Casey (our gender-neutral name). We also tested and compared the names Derek and Mollie.

Limited in time and resources, we were unable to create a databank of burrito lengths, widths, girths, and weights to compare. But these pictures stand alone: in one the male burrito is larger, in the other, it’s the girl.

The Manager
Chipotle was not available for comment. The manager at the Fairfax Chipotle, Dalton, said it was company policy that he was “prohibited from commenting.” He provided a phone number to Chipotle corporate, which was busy each of the four times I called.

In no way am I trying to prove that Chipotle—or their employees are sexist—this was just an interesting experiment about expectations, stereotypes, and food in our world.

The Verdict
If you’re a pint-sized person with a voracious appetite, try ordering under your own name—no matter how intense it sounds.

Shoutout to senior Maddy Moriarty and her friend Garrett Stephens for helping out with this experience in gender and burrito science (PHOTO BY MORIARTY).

A rare photo of two burritos of the opposite gender feat. the floor of the make out hallway (PHOTO BY KAPCAR).

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